MOL - Man of Leisure

Finally at the ripe age of 46, still alive and of sound limbs and unsound mind I eventually became what I was destined to become – a man of leisure, and I decided to dedicate the rest of my life in doing what I have been doing all my life so far – to have fun; complete and unadulterated. In the intelligentsia parlance, MOL translates as a lazy, good for nothing, doing nothing bum who has enough resources and verbosity to convince the society at large that there is some use of him after all and what he does or pretends to do is far above the intellectual repertoire of ordinary mortals; hence he is beyond reproach, ridicule and remorse. I differ in one aspect from this kind of MOL since I am a purist and I don’t have enough resources, on every other count, I count. With a long line of fate and ripening girth of my life line on my palm I have a long and healthy life stretched out like the Milky Way in front of me; or so they say according to the gospel by Cheiro on the subject. Despite my best and sincere efforts (countless) till date to prove the contrary, the art of palmistry has had the upper palm (literally) so far. So now when I find myself twiddling my thumb for the better part of day and worse part of night, I am beginning to ponder and wonder what after all I should do with my life.

Having said that, let’s read the catch, as you all know well by now that whenever I say something (and some of you say that I say a lot) there is always a catch or rather catches; after all I used to be the star wicketkeeper of my college and University despite my despise for the game, which was discovered and devised by the ultimate nation of leisure, the British. My conditions are that I will never work again for money; only for love, will never work under or above anyone, only with someone and only if that person happens to share the same passion for life and for all beings living and dead, it will help if that person wears ‘dare devil may care’ attitude on her eyelashes and I will only engage into something (which can be absolutely anything) that triggers my passion and heart and which would entail me to travel and unravel further the mysteries of the universe. I will never do anything ever again that is going to tie me down to a place called and resembling an ‘office’ or paperwork and I will only do things that would add smiles, happiness and merriment to our world in whatever form possible.

All the above is fuzzy, even to my muddled brain, and so I dip into history to find the greatest of MOLs that the world has seen and produced yet. As they say; we must learn from our past and improve into our future. After Googling, Binging, Wikkipediaing, Britannicaing, etc much to my surprise I could not unearth even one single solitary MOL predecessor whose example and illuminated path I could follow. This stank of conspiracy far outshining those that Dan Brown has made his millions on. Once again as they say (I would really like to know who this omniscient ‘they’ is) that whatever is possibly conceivable, imaginable, doable, achievable, etc etc has already been done by someone somewhere somehow. We may not know about it, but for sure no one in today’s world can be the master of an ‘original’ never before accomplished enterprise. So either all the MOLs in history are still buried under the debris of distorted history or they have been able to disguise their true occupation under subterfuges and decoys for the fear of ridicule; as I discovered recently that people don’t take you seriously if you say that your occupation is ‘to do nothing’.

But I do not resent or fear ridicule or rebuke, reprimand or reward and gladly accept and officially declare that I am a complete, total, irrevocably MOL. I do nothing.

While keeping the above in mind I thought of several options I have ahead of me:

1) Experimental astronaut (with one way ticket and fuel only) for sending the first manned space shuttle to Alpha Centauri

2) To abseil into the bowels of every active volcano in the world

3) Climb the summit of all the mountains above 6000 m that have not yet been visited by human step

4) Crusade for all the G7 leaders to attempt in creating a world without boundaries and war

5) Awaken within those who have more than they need to share and have compassion for those who have far less than they must

6) To reverse or slow down global warming to the level where it is naturally acceptable

7) To teach civic sense to every Indian so that they may not spit, urinate, litter all over the country

8) In some humane way, if possible, make half the Indian population disappear into the outer space and therefore create the first outer space colony of Indians (believe me only Indians can do this)

My wish list is endless and as a registered, certified and fully qualified MOL I will try to fulfill each or at least one of them. Meanwhile if you come up with some ideas where a MOL like me is required then do let me know. I could have written this post endlessly, after all it is about my real vocation and occupation, but I now have to leave for an expedition so the mountains beckon; and you very well know when they call, what happens to me. So take care, good luck and god speed to all of you. Wish me luck too as my forthcoming enterprise is literally on and off the edge.

For the records, this would be my only post during September 2010 and for that reason I am sure my blog is going to plummet in ranking, etc but hopefully not in popularity. I would return in October, god willing, with many more stories from my vertical world. Till then as always: SEE U ALL ON TOP!